Terrebonne Parish, LA – July 9, 2024
In a move that has left political analysts and cryptid enthusiasts scratching their heads, the legendary Rougarou, Louisiana’s infamous swamp werewolf, has declared his candidacy for President of the United States. Standing on a platform of “howling for change” and “swamp-to-table leadership,” the Rougarou promises to shake up the political landscape with his ferocious energy and bayou charm.
"A New Era of Monster Politics"
The Rougarou, known for his terrifying nocturnal transformations and penchant for chasing down those who break Lent, took to the swamps to announce his campaign. "For too long, America has been in the grips of the same old human politicians," he growled through a translator (a brave Cajun with a knack for cryptid linguistics). "It’s time for a new era. An era where the voices of the supernatural are heard and respected."
The Lutin as VP: A Mischievous Choice
In a twist that has left Cajun folklore fans delighted, the Rougarou has chosen the Lutin, a mischievous imp from Louisiana folklore, as his running mate. Known for his trickery and small stature, the Lutin has promised to bring an abundance of mischief to Washington. "Together, we will bring a little magic, a little mystery, and even more mischief to the White House than ever before," the Lutin said, before promptly disappearing in a puff of smoke.
A Platform Unlike Any Other
The Rougarou’s platform includes a number of unprecedented policies:
- Full Moon Healthcare Plan: Comprehensive coverage that peaks during lunar cycles.
- Swamp Conservation: Preserving natural habitats for cryptids and humans alike.
- Laissez-Faire Lent Laws: Relaxing dietary restrictions during Lent, he promises to combat rising seafood prices with the new "Free the Meat" policy.
- Cryptid Rights: Advocating for the equal treatment of all supernatural beings, ensuring they are not just legends but recognized citizens of the bayou.
Skeptics and Supporters
While skeptics argue that a werewolf and an imp may not be the most stable leadership duo, supporters are howling with excitement. "Finally, a candidate who understands the importance of bayou life and late-night prowling," said Gary Thibodaux, a local fisherman. "And let’s be honest, can they really be worse than the politicians we’ve already had?"
Campaign Strategy
Political analysts are already predicting a campaign like no other. The Rougarou has promised to personally visit all 50 states, primarily during the full moon, and the Lutin has pledged to prank every debate opponent by braiding their hair. Fundraising efforts are expected to include swamp tours and haunted bayou tours, promising a unique blend of terror and entertainment.
Get your exclusive Rougarou tees here!
The Road Ahead
As the Rougarou and Lutin hit the campaign trail, Americans are left to ponder the possibilities of a cryptid-led administration. Will they bring the change they promise, or will it be a wild ride through the swamps?
Only time will tell, but one thing is certain: the 2024 presidential race just got a lot more interesting, and perhaps a little more supernatural.
Follow the campaign and if you're lucky you may catch a glimpse of Mr. The Rougarou at Rougarou Fest on October 18-20, 2024 in Houma, LA.
Don't forget to wear your Rougarou shirt to the Boo Tees Apparel booth for a free gift!*
*Free gift only applies to Rougarou shirts purchased from Boo Tees Apparel
